There’s a race to be at the top, to be better than everyone else. 

But how do we define “being better” than someone else? 

Maybe we define this with a GPA — 

a supposed measure of “intelligence.” 

Maybe we define this with our salary, 

or the number of followers we have on social media — 

a supposed measure of how “likable” or “valued” 

we are. 

Maybe we define this with the prospect of 

getting into an “elite” college. 

We crave the exclusivity, 

believing that if we get in, 

it makes us 

more intelligent, 

hard working, 

diligent… 

better than those around us. 

There is no way – or no useful way – to determine who’s “better,” 

or if we’re on par with those around us. 

Yet being at the “top” seems to bring some type of validation, the reassurance that we’re… 

successful. 

It’s all a temporary, sugary illusion that eventually leads us to feel 

…unfulfilled.  

If anything, competition takes away from the notion of success. 

The first step in competing is conforming, since to beat someone else at a game, 

you have to know the rules, in and out. 

Striving to get into a certain college, win a competition, follow a prescribed path… 

involves conforming to what others want to see, to what others expect. 

It is grueling work that does yield some temporary rewards. 

But it all comes at the price of an irreversible loss. 

In the process, we slowly fade away; we miss out on the opportunity to discover

who we are deep inside. 

When competition becomes the primary goal, 

we miss out on developing our individual values, 

as chasing after another ideal — because we think it’s right, 

because we think it’ll bring “fulfillment” — 

becomes our primary goal. 

But success draws from uniqueness, 

the opposite of conformity. 

Success is creating our own rules, 

playing our own game. 

Because if we feel good about who we are at heart,

if we feel as if we’ve pursued our goals, 

then we’ll feel — and be — successful. 

Then there is no desire to compete with anyone else, 

or to harbor envy. 

Where we stand in comparison to everyone else 

becomes.. irrelevant. 

All that matters is where we stand in comparison to… 

ourselves.